Friday, December 31, 2010

It's a New Year!

It's been a great year. 2010 had taught and given us a lot.
There have been bittersweet memories that changed quite a lot of things, mainly ourselves.
But I wouldn't change any bit of it. I'm pretty much happy being the person I am now.
I'm looking forward for 2011. Start college and leave my school years as my golden days.
Can I cope with it? I'm not sure but that's what I said in 2010 and...I made it.
So, I hope that 2011 will be a better year for all of us and the world.
Less hate, more love. Less wars, more peace.

Happy New Year, everyone! Have a wonderful 2011 :)

Wednesday, December 29, 2010


An ending is near and a new beginning is about to begun. Like for every 365/366 days.

Same old routine but always with new hopes, new dreams and new desires. Best part, none of them usually meet our expectations. We end up disappointed and decide to have a new resolution again and again.

So all I ask for 2011 is just to be better than 2010.

In 2010, I have:

1. Meet and made new friends.
2. Fought and made ex-friend(s).
3. Went through real debates tournaments and finally won ;)
4. Grew closer with my girlfriends.
5. Learn not to fall for pretty words.
6. Understand that school life is fun, even though it's a pain in the ass.

I'm turning 18 soon. School is officially over for me. My siblings are going to start a new school year next Monday and I can't help but to feel left out. Sure, soon-to-be college life sounds great. I can drive, wear normal clothes, arrange my own schedule but I'll miss those moments when those guys in the back make stupid jokes whenever a 'specific' teacher passes by. Not to mention, the loud noises and shouts when the recesses bell rings. Or when I'll just sit at a few tables with my friends and start talking non-stop when the teacher is absent.

Dammit. I miss school.

But we all have to grow up and keep on moving. All my friends are heading to different colleges ;-( I know, we'll meet up whenever we can on weekends and shop and hang out. But it's going to be different. I won't have them beside me or behind me as usual in classes, where they'll whisper something in my ear and I'll laugh, ending up being called up by the teacher to repeat what she had just said. *face palm*

I can't wait for college. Start my A-levels. Meet new people and at the same time, keep my high school friends close to me. Time is such a cruel yet priceless thing.

So in 2011, I hope for a better year than 2010. I want to be happier. Wiser. More patient. More hardworking. I want to be better. I want 2011 to be a fun and wild journey, just like my 2010 had been for me. Just more fun and wilder!

thank you, for always being there for me

keep on chasing, never ever stop.

Saturday, December 25, 2010

Admit It


It sucks, doesn't it? When you care for someone and in the end, their reply is "I don't care." You care for some people because you care for them. You don't need to tell them that I care for you, they would know by the things you do. What's even horrible is that they won't tell you that they don't care for you, instead they simply shrug or chose to ignore. So, you give and you lose. You hurt and you bleed. You fall and you cry. You sit and you hope.

And you rot.

Look, if they don't care for you, what makes you think that they'll come and search for you in the dark? If you can care that much for people, you can care at least some for yourself. Stand up and walk again. Don't lose hope but be more wise. Learn and grow. The pain won't really go away, you would get over it but once in a while, you get flashbacks and your heart drops a little. But hey, that happens, right? At least, you know you DID truly care for those people.

Yes, it hurts to see when they care for other people and not you. It makes you feel unworthy and pathetic. You feel stupid when you think back of all the things you have done but nothing in the past will ever change. Put it this way: You FELT unworthy and pathetic. You FELT stupid when you think back of all things you HAD done. Now, you live your life, caring for the right people who in turn have been around you all along.

Don't stop caring, don't be afraid to care. You're hurt once but you'll live through it.

Merry Christmas, everyone! xoxo

Thursday, December 16, 2010

Don't Regret, Don't Stop

Dear Santa, all I want for Chrismtas is
to have a good & wonderful 2011.

I don't celebrate Christmas as big as I celebrate other festivals. Financially, I shop a lot...well, I WANT to shop a lot since Christmas sales are on right now at every big shopping malls. My heart bled when I couldn't buy that floral print dress from ZARA. Gosh, I can't wait to start working part time next month(even though I'm sure I'll hate working) but at least, I can earn my own money and shop.

I'm a shopaholic.

2010 is coming to an end. I still can't believe I have finished my school life already. Looking back at my old posts, back when I was still a school girl, brings tears of both joy and sadness. It's a mix up feeling. I'm not sure if I quite like it but I guess there is just some things are left in the grey area for us. But...I did it :) when I clearly thought I could die by going through it.

In each year that passes, we make more and more mistakes. Because as we grow, we learn new things and broaden our perspective of life. Right now, it's the time for my friends and I to make critical decisions in our lives.

The most frequently asked question: "What do you want to do?"

ARGH. I don't know! I mean, yes, of course I have some visions of me in the future. I love writing and books but that doesn't mean I will end up becoming a writer. I could end up being a professor in some university. This is life. There is so many possibilities. Honestly, I believe that no matter how much we planned or how long we planned, there will always be a little twist in everything. We just got to accept it.

People are afraid to make mistakes. They are afraid that what they decide now will affect them greatly later in life. I got those "are you sure you want to do that" remarks when I say I want to do Arts for A-levels. *SIGH*

Firstly, I am sure. If not, I won't be saying 'I want'.

Secondly, if everybody is taking Science, what's going to happen to the Arts? Just because it doesn't involve needles and chemicals, doesn't make it any less cooler or lame. Arts, Language, Literature are what keeps the world a happier, more peaceful and colourful place to live in.

Thirdly, do what you love. I'm doing what I love and THAT is right.

It may seem scary to choose but in the end, we all have to decide. It's better for you to decide for your ourselves than letting others to. Nobody knows what you want like you do. I believe this is the time for us to make mistakes. So what if what you decide now doesn't seem to be like what you had wanted? We can't always have things to our ways only, it just doesn't work like that. I think in a way, it teaches us to be patient and not to take things too seriously at times.

When we make mistakes, we learn from it without knowing. It hurts, it sucks but you have to go through it every phases of life. Okay. So maybe, it's never what you really wanted but you will end up in the right place that is meant for you, eventually. What take the highway when you can take those long, curvy roads? I rather take my life slowly with full of surprises than taking it fast, with everything planned out working the way it is...and not fully appreciating everything I see.

Life is an extraordinary book. It's book with no beginning and no endings. It just keeps on going and going. So, good grades and a good job is just a small part of life. We have to change our perspective of life, don't look at it as an academic, we have to make mistakes and just enjoy life.

Don't stop at a place for too long. Keep on moving with the world.

Monday, December 13, 2010


The world is such a big place for us to live in. Too many possibilities, too many what-if's.

I wish I could just flashback and relive those moments I have long missed. Those times when everything seemed right, when laughter and long talks were the only things we do.

If time machine exists, I would turn back time and be a little girl again. Right now, I didn't know why back then, I wanted to grow up so fast. I thought being a woman would be fun. Now, looking at little kids, I wonder if they are thinking the way I did when I was their age.

Sharanya, Ina, Alliya, Divya and Sze Yan; school's over and we're going to different paths. I hope nothing between us change. Let's grow up together and no matter how far we may be, we have to meet up and be school girls all over again.

Sometimes I just pause and think "what happened?" Maybe we just outgrow sometimes, or need something new. But I guess there'll always be somethings in life that I'll never ever find out. Maybe some thing are better left unsaid.

Chocolate is the universal food. Amin.

Things change, people change. Cry for a day and get over it. The world won't stop spinning for you. So the best you can do is hope for the best to come and be strong.

"Make the clock reverse. Bring back what once was mine."

"My dearest Cinderella, I'm the luckiest prince to be marrying you."

Don't frown, you never know might be falling for your smile.

Wednesday, December 8, 2010


OMG. OMG. I thought this day would never come...but it did!


Well, I still one last subject to take next Wednesday but that is really not an important one - I don't have to study it :) 9 freaking subjects I've taken. I have sat for 21 freaking papers - and I SURVIVED! I kinda may sound like I'm overreacting but SPM is like the peak point for every student's life and for me, to have finally get over it after 17 years - it's just PURE RELIEF.

Yeayy! Now I can take my license (driveeee), no more school uniform, no more daily assembly. I'm going to miss school though :( Miss sitting together and fooling around with my classmates. We really grew up together despite not being related together. I'm looking forward to college but after 11 years of being in school, I think nothing can ever beat school.

There's so much to do, so much to expect and so much to experience.

And 2010 is coming to an end.

Time flies too fast sometimes. I still remember the first day I stepped into secondary school, hahaha, OMG - I was naive! I think we all were once, then we grew up and think back, "WHAT THE HELL MAN?!"

2010 has been a fairly good year :) Had one of the best experience in my life and definitely, the year I'm going to keep looking back. One day we're all together, the next day we're off in separate ways pursuing our dreams. I don't think we'll lose touch - Facebook is here to connect us but of course, things would change but I hope it's all for the better.

Gonna grab my KFC now, super duper hungry.

Saturday, November 13, 2010

I was so bored, I decorated my calculator :s

Horribly shitty -.- I need a HAIRCUT BADLY!
after SPM :/

A few more days and I'll be an alumni of SMK Bukit Jelutong!
How cool is that :B HAHA!

School life is coming to an end in a few days time. But exams is starting soon and we still have to go to school to sit for the papers but no in the same class with our classmates anymore :s I tell you - I bet I'll be seated in the HUGE exam hall and I hate it! Lucky for those who get seated in classes instead, it feels better to sit for exams in classes rather than BIG hall; it scares me :/

I am going to do and give my very best! Oh God, I can't wait for this freaking SPM to be over with! I'm super worried for SPM and pretty sad that school life will be over, but I'm glad that, FINALLY, it's going to be a closed chapter :-}

I shall be taking a long vacation from blogging now. I will be back on the 8th December - a week break before the LAST paper which is on the 15th December. Wish me lots of luck, aite?! I REALLY NEED IT!

Thank you, my blogging buddies who wished me luck for my SPM :') I really appreciate it.

GOODBYE....for now!

Saturday, November 6, 2010

A very Happy Deepavali/Diwali
to all who are celebrating!

I went to my friend's open house today and it was awesome! Food was amazing, Friends were amazing - I just love traditional celebrations, don't you? Next stop is Chinese New Year! Early next February, can't wait :B

17 days to go before SPM. Seriously, fuck man. No kidding. 10 subjects, more than 20 papers to sit; oh Lord, save me ;-( But at the same time, I can't wait for it to be done with! After 17 good long years, I can finally enter college and see part of the real world.

Sorry if I'm not replying your mails, I really don't have the time to re-read through it and type out my long and truthful reply. My blog posts are getting shorter and more random but that's because I really don't have the energy and time to think out what to write anymore - at this time. After SPM which ends on 15th December, I'll be on good tracks again :-) Promise.


5 Beta 2010 <3

Deepavali :-)

they are the best things that's even been mine

Friday, October 29, 2010

Goodbye? Not Just Yet.

24 more days,
and this uniform will only be a memory,
and ponytails won't be compulsory.

24 more days. OMG :| I am so not ready, I am not kidding you. I know, I've been saying this for like the past posts but I can't help it! Counting down the days, I am glad that once and for all, it's going to be closed chapter and I can begin a new journey...but at the same time, I'm worried, scared and sad.

Pfffftt. I'm talking as though I'm the only one who's feeling like this.

But I can't stop these roller coaster feelings! One minute, I'm alright; next minute, I'm stressed out and on the edge of breaking down. Usually it happens when I'm doing Add Maths. Damn you, Add Maths. Damn you, Science subjects. After SPM, that will be the LAST time I'll ever study and sit for you. I shall take Arts subjects - not drawing (I can't draw) but English Literature/Journalism/Creative Writing in college. Period.

"So what college are you going to?"

"....I don't know!"

Taylors, I suppose? But really, that's not confirmed at all. I will be going down there in Subang with my parents on its Open Day. Mum said NO to Diploma, it's risky and will do me no good. I have no objections for as long as I can get into college and graduate with a Degree - or better, Masters :D

"What are you going to take?"

".....I don't know!"

Most obvious one now is A-levels or maybe, Canadian Pre-U - but nothing's confirmed either. Need to do more research and see which is the best. A-levels is HARD but if you score well, it'll do you BLOODY GOOD. Maximum 4 may sound little but the percentage of people scoring all A's for A-levels is as thin as a paper. YEAH :/

Sunday, October 24, 2010

Everything Has Its Ending

This is it.

Graduation Day is on 3rd November.


I can't believe it, I'm graduating soon. So fast.

Okay. Well, we are graduating earlier but we still have to sit for our SPM which falls on 23rd November :/ Graduations are held earlier almost at every single school here because our exams finish differently according to the subjects we take and we are taking our SPM during the long, national school holidays.

Still. OHMYGOD. Hahaha, I still can't believe it myself. Graduation. It's going to be held at Dewan Jalan Adang - where the heck is there? And we(girls) have to wear baju kurung and kasut bertumit tinggi tutup. Are you freaking kidding me? I don't mind baju kurung, let's all go baju kurun crazy fan girls on that day but CLOSED TOES HIGH HEELS? Pffft. Whatever. Like they're gonna check how pretty my toes are.

ONE MORE MONTH TO GO. Well, 29 days.

Lord, save me :"-(

There's so many things going on right now, besides studies. You know one of those few things that you, yourself only understand because it is you, yourself going through it? Yeah, I'm going through one of that. I wish it was just black & white, you know? Right now, I'm left without answers and I'm...confused.

Should I search for the answer? Wait for it? Maybe it would appear unexpectedly when I least expect for it? HOW. I hate this. I hate not knowing how to do, what to do; it makes me feel hopeless. And Hope is what I really need right now. But I'm doing my best, pushing that aside as much as I try to and focus what lies ahead: SPM.

Straight A's? Honestly, no. I'm not a pessimist but me getting straight A's would be a WTF situation. Guess I'm never or never was the academic scorer kid in school. Oh well, I'll find my 'Ace' field once I enter college :) Hopefully in writing - Journalism, Creative Writing...nothing's decided. Right now, I'm trying my best to score good grades for SPM but of course, I want lots of A's! (Oh God, pleaseeeeeeeee, I don't want anything below B-!!)

"When we look back in 20 years time, we'll still be laughing like we used to and still get all those inner jokes like it was just yesterday."

Some of us won't be seeing each other after this but I'm pretty sure, none of us will ever forget each other. I'm hoping to keep my good friends as tight as now and we can all grow old together :-)

That sounds like a plan. A good, long way plan I will(God willing) achieve.

Thursday, October 21, 2010

My friend told me to listen to this and I love it :-} Not a huge fan of Taylor Swift but have to admit, she writes really good! Now, I love zis song!

Someday, I’ll be, living in a big old city,
And all you’re ever gonna be is mean.
Someday, I’ll be big enough so you can’t hit me,
And all you’re ever gonna be is mean.
Why you gotta be so mean?

Monday, October 11, 2010

Drowning In Myself

"You can do this!" "You have to do this!" "Nothing is impossible!"

Oh yeah? I doubt what cross your mind everyday.

Expectations. We all have expectations for ourselves, let it be for studies, work, jobs - we all have the bar set up high and say 'I'm gonna reach that bar'. As we climb up to reach that bar, we go through many types of obstacles that make a foot high bar feeling like eternity. But that's what it's all about, right? Not about how fast you reach the top but what you've been through to reach the top.

Right now, I feel so hopeless. Like a failure. 38 more days and I'm still struggling.

I expect myself to do better, to obtain a REALLY GOOD result for SPM but now...I don't know. My expectation is killing me but it's what that keeps me going. Other people's expectations like parents and teachers - how am I ever going to reach that?

38 more days.

I know I shouldn't hear what others have to say but they are right. I feel so burdened by these expectations, even burdening myself with my own expectation.

38 more days.

Can I do it? I really am not sure. All I want is to curl in my bed and cure this daily basis headache from my lacking of sleep. I worry too much, though I can't help it in moments like this when everything seem to be falling off the sky.

38 more days.

❒ Single ❒ Taken ❒ Lesbian ✔ In a contract relationship with SPM til it's over.

I need more discipline. I need some luck. I need lots of never ending work. I need HOPE right now.

Friday, October 8, 2010

You Make Me Happy :")

HEY YOU! :-)

Trial is finally over but I feel anything but glad and relieved.
SPM is on the 23rd of November so you can imagine how my mind is feeding up right. Trial just ended yesterday so I'm giving my brain a break today. Most probably I'll have 'late night dates' with my books tonight. I've been worrying so much lately that I keep having migraines for a week straight.

Panadol became my second food after coffee to keep calm and awake. Migraine is really horrible, it's like knives jabbing from inside of your head.

One of the few things I learn from trial is: 1) Last minute studying is BULLCRAP. 2) Never ever panic when sitting for an exam.

46 more days...I cannot wait for SPM to be over with. SERIOUSLY. If it was not for SPM, I would have actually enjoy my last year of school. I can't even remember any day during Form 5 when I not think about SPM.

Don't you feel thankful and bless that there are people around you who makes you happy? I really don't know what I'll do without them. It doesn't have to be those big gifts. They could just be sitting next to me or miles away, talking to me and it's more than I could ask for.

I love those people especially who actually listens to you. It makes me feel like I'm worth 2 ears to listen and a heart to understand. Okay, maybe I just like talking to people a lot. I can't help it. It depends. I can be the talker at one point and the silencer, the very next minute.

Hmm, I'm going to miss my classmates a lot after school is over :"( Even though some of them can be a real pain in the ass. Through all the bitter moments that left us estranged towards each other and hatred thrown, we still sit together in class and have those inner jokes that only us, classmates would understand.

I have a confession: Sometimes I would to people's formspring as anonymous and type - "You're so pretty!" or "You are beautiful, you know that?"

Because 98% of the formspring's comments or questions are just plain horrible and acidic. What's with all the foul languages in one sentence just because that person happened to be pretty? Happened to date your ex?

Honestly, GET A LIFE. Don't be so bitter. I write those comments because I know anyone who reads that will feel happy themselves and not think the whole world is against them. You have nothing nice to say, don't say especially through online. You have a problem, solve it face to face CALMLY. Don't start throwing chairs and your tantrums. I hate these people.

"Life can be so randomly beautiful." -
Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen

Sunday, October 3, 2010

Sunday, September 19, 2010

I am so sorry for being able to comment back or read your blogs lately. Life has been SO BUSY for me lately. Trial starts next Wednesday (OMFG) like 'shitta shit shoot'. Trial is harder than SPM, believe it or not. Seriously so that's why I'm like freaking out but not hoping too much for my grades this time.

But I want to get all A's & B's (I'm not smart) above! If I get all 10 A+ for my SPM, the government would give me a scholarship straight away :O

*Pffft* Like that's gonna happen to me. I'm not being negative and stuff but I know where I stand. I'm not stupid but I'm not smart either. It's true, academic wise. 10 A+ are like grades that the smartest of the smartest can get. I'm not excellent in Science and Maths...those that really crack your brain. Nope, not all.

I'm an Arts girl caught in Science stream. Just my luck.

But I just can't wait for all these to be over, you know. Trial, SPM & school. 4 more months...then school is over me. 4 MORE MONTHS. Oh God. And SPM is like in November, mid november :/ Somebody shoot me already. I want it to be over like NOW!

Time seems so fast and slow at the same time, this year. I can't quite put my hands to it but yeah, that's how it feels like now. I wouldn't say 2010 is my favourite year but it's one of the years I'll never ever forget :) I met a lot of new people this year and got to know some people whom I know but never close with - and it's so nice, really. I keep thinking about how will we all go from here.

Sure, I hope some things remain unchanged but the future is always changing. So just let it be, don't control it and don't hope too high.

Saturday, September 11, 2010

Twist in Life

open house :)

Aunt & Sis.

grandparents <3


There's been quite a lot of things going on lately. No, nothing serious or drastic., you know. Eid Mubarak was fun, though not as fun as I celebrated in the city this year. Usually we'll go back to my grandpa's hometown but this year, we didn't. Sigh :(

Speaking of life, I didn't realize that I was holding on and hoping that things would remain the same forever. Sub-consciously, I think all of us are scared of changes at the beginning. We begin to question 'Why', 'How' and 'What' but the truth is, there's really no honest answers. Just answers we create to comfort ourselves.

Sometimes I sit back and keep on asking myself - "Where did it all go wrong?" I spent loads of time, mentally thinking about it that at one point, I felt depressed. Haha, I think too much, that's the problem. But soon I realized "Nothing went wrong. Things just...changed."

Okay, here's an analogy. Imagine 2 people are walking on one straight road and they reached a junction; a left turn and a right turn. This guy feels like he has to take the right turn and the other thinks that he has to take the left turn. And so, they cross each other and took their own turns. At the end, there's no good reason why they took those turns, same applies to changes. It just happened.

'People change. Hearts move on.' At one point, you felt that it was heading this way; then all of a sudden, you get lost in the woods, trying to find your way out. At once, we start to panic - human nature :) But the truth is, we shouldn't panic cause we're lost. The thing is: we are never really lost. We just think we are.

That's what happened to me. I thought I was lost. I keep looking for a way out, back to where I last came from. But you know as they say 'keep moving forward'. It was hard at first, it was hard to accept and grasp it but I've come to my sense. My mind still wanders and think about it but as for my feelings and heart, they've moved on, slowly but greatly.

We are all scared of the changing and growing process. We're not sure where we're heading, what's to come and why is this happening to me situations...The key to this whole thing is just to accept it as the way it is. Don't fight or deny it but just say 'I'll work this out'. I may be not some 60 years old philosopher but I know at this point, that's a fact we all have to accept to get our lives going.

You know what I CANNOT wait for now? SPM to be over done with. Like shit over.

I have to really start studying now. I don't want to regret later. Cause then, I'll have no one to blame but myself.

Life's a beach, I'm just playing in the sand ;)

Thursday, September 9, 2010

Last Day of Fasting :)

ohh, all the food and money $$$

That's in Malaysian version :)
but also known as Eid Mubarak.

There's been a lot of dispute over Islam and now,
'Burn a Quran Day' on this Saturday :/

I just want to say that,
Don't let these minority people make you hate Islam and Muslims.
If there's anyone whose at fault, it's those who did wrong.
Not Islam, not every Muslims, not me.

No religion teaches their people to do bad things.
No religion is evil. No bloody such thing.

I'll post some pictures after I'm done celebrating with all my family and friends, aite?
Til then, take care! xoxo

Monday, September 6, 2010

Dreams - Gone, Kept, Wasted

You know what's make us, humans so wasted?
Besides the fact we waste food, money and whatsoever.
Dreams are wasted, more than any of us could ever imagined.
Loss of hope, faith and trust - one dream after another, they all come crushing down.
We throw away those wasted, 'never became' dreams aside,
letting them pile up and rot in the attic.

But maybe, if we have worked harder to achieve them.
Maybe if we had set our priorities straight,
if we put effort in those dreams, we could've made them real.

Don't you think it's sad? Dreams are being wasted.
Because it's wasting yourself. There must be a reason why those were your dreams.
Because it makes you smile. It makes you happy.
Because that's all you really ever ask for.

The thing about us is that we dream only because we believe,
it can never happen.
Every night, we lie in our beds, everything passing through our minds;
we dream of those things we believe we could never have.
We sigh and smile in our sleeps because it felt real enough
but never good enough.

When we wake up and realized that it's all over,
we tell ourselves, 'I'll dream about it tonight.'
True enough, we're creating 2 dimensions of ourselves;
the world that we walk on and the place where we dream to live.

Dreams. Our most wasted trash.
But not everything works on a shooting star, right?

Monday, August 30, 2010

Baby Dumping

What would you do if you managed
to catch these people doing this?

Baby dumping are on the rise in Malaysia, seriously! Like flooding. Just last night, my friend was passing by at a place and she saw policemen surrounded something on a ground. It was BABY! Someone DUMPED a baby like he or she was just some trash. Even Barbie dolls are being treated better.

We were all so DISGUSTED and felt so ANGRY when we heard that. Who in the right mind would such a horrible, hideous act?

Mostly are these teens or college students, they have unprotected sex and when the girl finds out she's pregnant...BIG PROBLEM. Abortion is illegal in Malaysia unless it involves the safety of the mother and the unborn child. Some of them would go for abortions but some would just have their babies and...throw them away. Like WTH man.

Why can't they just put their babies at some shelters? Why throw them into rubbish cans? Why hang them in paper bags at the billboards? Why flush them down the toilets? That's murder! How can you kill your own baby! Kill your own child, for cryin' out loud. If a newborn baby could speak, that will be the death of you.

A lot of issues have been brought up in the media and the government to overcome this serious social problem. One of it is sex education. As usual, some say yes, some say no. Some say parents should be teaching, not in school; others say, parents don't even teach at home. Both sides have their points but when you weigh it properly, it's kinda obvious.

Yes to Sex Education.

Asian parents are very conservative about sex. They don't teach their kids about sex. My parents never taught be about sex, they avoid it at all cost. Same goes to all my friends. So where do we learn from? Simple, books and magazines. Mostly, books. Storybooks. To be honest, I didn't know what the fuck I was reading at first! LMAO.

My parents would be so surprised on what I know now, HAHA.

Parents don't teach, children get curious. They treat sex as a taboo subject. So when kids get older, they get wilder and keen to explore. When they have sex, all they think at that moment is fun and love. When the girl says 'I'm pregnant', either the boy leaves or kill the baby. So teach sex education in school!

Lastly, if you still really want to have sex - WEAR A CONDOM! Sheesh.

But please just stop with the baby dumping, please. Give them up for adoption. There are SO MANY childless couples out there who are willing to do or give anything to have children. Let somebody who is capable to look after your baby, give them a chance.

Babies are innocent. What wrong did they do to you? Nobody is wrong for being born into this world. Babies deserve to live.

Do the right thing, don't be a murderer.


Saturday, August 28, 2010

Interview with a Psychologist

My friends and I were interviewed by a psychologist. No, we aren't troubled kids or anything. It's this career test we took up in school and our school counselor is a certified psychologist who interviewed us. It was cool but quite awkward at first.

There were 4 of us and he nailed our personalities on the dot without us saying or doing anything except for him, asking questions. Most of the time, we burst out laughing cause he managed to scrap out those little secrets that only 4 of us knew. Well, he didn't get the full story but he did sense that he got something.

I'm not gonna reveal any of my friends's interviews. I don't think it would be nice :)

So here's mine. Well, part of it of what I can recall.

P: "When were you born?"

Q: "25/5/1993"

P: "You're supposed to like travelling a lot. Do you?"

Q: "Yes, I like it a lot."

P: "What's your favourite colour?"

Q: "Green."

P: "Number 7...(he was using numerology :O)"

Q: "What?"

P: "You need to communicate with the entire world. You have the urge to connect with the whole universe. Number 7 people are all like that. Do you know what's 7 stands for?""

Q: "Nooo...." (We were all lost at first but soon, we got it)

P: "7 days a week, 7 rainbow colours, the 7 oceans. Do you understand what I mean now?"

He missed out the 7 wonders of the world!!

P: "You're a hot tempered person. Get angry easily."

Q: (HOMG) "Yes."

Not many people know that. He looked at me which I presume was studying me before making that statement.

P: "You're the type of person who can't stand being lectured or hearing lectures. You hate lectures. You can tip off quickly. You can't be bound by rules or boundaries. You need to get out or break every rule there is. And that's why you can't get along with conventional typed of people."

P: "You like being alone, don't you?"

Q: "Alone?"

P: "I'd say 70% alone, 30% with friends. Or issit 60%, 40%?"

It took my friend to explain to me why he said that since I told that I spend a lot of time with my friends.

My friend said, 'When you're with us, sometimes, you space you're here with us but you're not really here with us. It's like shutting yourself out from the world, being alone but still sitting with us.'

But I'm no EMO!

Lastly, after all the took nearly 3 to 4 hours! We were so tired and exhausted, mentally. Honestly, we were feeling like that. We didn't quite sure know why. My friends ended up with best careers choices for them like Mass Com, Business and Bakery.

I got Psychology. Wooo hoooo!

I love writing and all, and debating. But psychology had always interest me in a way like never before.

He told us to do a research about the careers he gave us, just to google about it and understand it. He told me I could study Psychology and specialized in Pediatrician for Children or Adolescents. But there are other specialization for Psychology too.

My results of searching and googling are these:

4 years of college
4 years of medic school
3 years of an internship and residency

and freaking expensive. Like VERY.

It's a LONG journey but I love to study humans. The behaviours. How do we react, why do we react like that. Depressions, social problem. It intrigues me, really. I think us, humans are fascinating creatures, always curious, on the run. I like to keep asking 'WHY?' and then get the answers out. I like to study how the brain works and what cause us to behave like that.

I'm just a REALLY curious person. The world just keeps surprising me.

Oh well. We plan but God always decides.
There's so much I can hope and wished for but the fate shall decide.

Take care, everyone! See ya next week :)

Thursday, August 26, 2010

Saturday, August 21, 2010

Do You Believe?

Do you believe in fairytales?

Do you remember watching those Disney movies where the Princesses are waiting and looking for their Princes Charming? Snow White, I believe is one of the oldest Disney Princess but I was never fond of her. I like Bell from Beauty & The Beast - my favourite Princess Disney movie.

Eventually we all grew out of those fairytale lands, didn't we? We were soon taught, educated and told that fairytale do not exist. You want something, go and chase after it. We can't be waiting for Prince Charming to come knocking on our doors and propose to us the very next minute. This world we currently living in do not hold the word 'fairytale' and often, we see older kids getting annoyed at their younger siblings whenever their imaginations go wild and having fun in their fairytale world.

Cinderella walked on broken glass, Sleeping Beauty let her whole life pass by, Belle fell in love with a beast, Pocahontas risked her life for a feast, Jasmine could have had anyone but she chose a poor man, and Ariel, she walked on land.”

But what if it's not about waiting for the stars to fall out from the sky? I know a lot of people who hate fairytale but deep within, I'm sure everyone wants their fairytale to happen. We all want that Prince Charming - in our own way. Okay, so he may not be a Prince Charming but he'll be the Prince to your very own.

We've been fooled, cheated, hurt, betrayed, lead on...but that's alright. We do not live in a fairytale land but we can make our fairytale land. Along that journey is anything but easy; with the belief, faith and hope - we can make it through, be the strongest. What's love without taking a risk on it? And if we don't, how are we going to open up and believe in love?

Many of us are afraid and either influence by what others say. Simple, don't. Don't let others tell you what or who you should date, why that person you like is not good enough for you, who should be the right one for you. Honestly, don't, you'll regret it. If it doesn't work out, it's alright. Take your time and search again. God had said that He made each and one of us with partners. It is up to us to search and find. Even God knows how to add adventure in it :)

So keep that heart open but strong. As long as it pumps, believe in fairytale. Believe in love. Believe in almost everything. My simple sentence for you is to just...take a leap in faith.

Friday, August 20, 2010

Less than A Hundred Days

HEY:) It's been long since I last blogged! Well, I'll be blogging on Fridays only. I really need to organize my time properly as well as use it properly. No facebooking for me (ohmygod), no twittering for me (whatthefuck) and no playing around anymore. But on Fridays, yes I shall! For a few hours. We all do need a little break, after all.

I want it to be all over quickly. I want SPM to be done with and SPM will be over for me in December only. Why does it seem so far away?? Yet I counted and I'm left with less than 100 days left 8O SHITTA. I forgot, it's mid-August already. How wonderful :|

But I'm so looking forward life after SPM! Hahaha, yeah, I've been talking a lot about SPM and my life after SPM lately but it's so close by and I can't help but to play all the things I want to do and am gonna do after SPM. It's so exciting and worrying!

There's PROM to go for right after SPM :D HOMG! Butttt when am I going to get the dress? I'm caught up in SPM from November to December and right after my SPM is over, few days later, it's Prom :/ I need a white dress, I need a pair of golden, gladiator heels. I need to SHOP. I need to do my hunting shopping. Window shopping! I just want to shop.

There's so many things going on my mind right now, so many things I want. And I just want to say this, 'Life is not about how many A's you score'. Obviously, getting good grades are important and nailing every single subject. But I hate it when people think that those who excel very well in academic are the 'good people' or 'they are going to be so great in life'.

I'm not saying my friends who are smart are not good people but seriously, life does not equal to academics. I rather be happy, knowing my life is happy than thinking my life is happy cause everyone says it is. I may not be the smartest girl you know but at least life is a bigger perception for me :)

P.S. I'm sorry that I haven't commented on each of your blog posts. I do read them! Really! But time is not being generous with me. I will, soon, promise.