Friday, May 28, 2010

The White Lies

Mmm-hmm. I changed my layout again. Couldn't help it, I just get bored easily. So I logged into Blogger yesterday and to my surprise, my good blogger friend, Thousif was awarding Blog Awards and he awarded me with the Consistency Award :D

Hahahah. I was flattered and really surprised. He gave other awards to others and wrote really sweet notes about them. You can visit his blog here: Soul Space. It's a very lively and interesting blog. He's one of loyal blog buddy, so thank you, Thousif throughout the blogging journey!

Have you ever encounter this situation whereby you are torn between the truth and lie? No no, nothing like murder and stuff but because, you know the truth and that person wants to know the truth but you know if you tell the truth, that person would end up hurt. I bet all of us have been through this before.

B: How's the food?

Me: Nice. (omg, wtf is this?)

B: Really? Yeay! I'm going to cook this for my friend's dinner.

Me: What? (oh shit, oh shit)

B: Why?

Me: (think, think) Well, I just thought maybe you could do something that your friend would like. You know...she likes fried chicken, right? Maybe you can do that, add around some spices and stuff...

B: (thoughtful) Maybe you're right. I should. After all, it is her dinner.

Me: (relieved) Yupp.

I didn't say her cooking was bad because I knew how much it would upset her but at the same time, I made her changed her mind about cooking that dish which would definitely bring the night to dust for everyone. This is what people call the White Lie.

Honestly, I'm not pretty sure why it's not called the Blue Lie or what so ever. But I think it's because the colour white brings the perception of pure and lie, well, we all have done that. So it's something like a pure lie where you lie because you have to; because you don't want to be insensitive and hurt that person's feeling.

The internet defined White Lie as an unimportant lie. Interesting, huh? Anyway, most men think like that. Women tell more white lies than men do because women are more sensitive and emotional while men would be thinking, let's get straight to the point. We can't blame women for being too sensitive since emotionally, it's a right thing to do yet we can't blame men for being too honest because honesty is the best policy.

I tell white lies even though that person tells me: I want your honest answer/opinion. Well, not ALL the time - it depends. Like for my sister, I never tell white lies to her. If she looks horrible in that outfit, I would just say: Are you serious? What are you thinking? Go and change.
But I guess, it's because she's my sister and there's absolutely no secrets between since birth.

But it involves friends, that can be tricky. Sometimes I can just say, 'No, it's not that nice/good/___' But it involves a lot of times when I just look at my friend's face and though: I can't do this to her/him. I would smile and say, 'Yes'. Most of the time, although I just don't see the way they do and when they ask for an honest answer, I would say 'as long you're happy, I don't see why not.'

Sometimes they know they don't look good in the outfit or their hairs are out of place, etc., they just want a lie to make them feel better. I know, they know, it's a lie but we all cover up and say what the ears want to hear. I don't usually ask for an honest answer or opinion, I prefer to just do it my way and the hell with the others who object it. So when I DO ask for an honest answer, the answers are mostly honest. For example, my mom and my sister - oh, and my brother are my honest-telling-to-me people. If I need the truth, to them I go too. If I need a lie, I turn to someone like a friend who always think about others feelings.

I've seen when people gave an honest answer and other people's reaction would be: How can you say that?! Pity her/him! All of us will be evaluating this situation differently but to me, if what that person is doing or whatever is at is harmless, give that person a White Lie. If it's risky or something totally out of a fairy-tale-story-line, look at that person in the eye, tell the truth and WHY.

Oh yes, I do know LIES are not good and are forbidden, a white lie is still a lie; but if that's what it takes to make someone smile or let them be happy, I would white lie to them. I would lie so as long as it does not pass the limit and is reasonable. Cause trust me, if all I do is truth with no white lies in between, I'll be one lonely person without friends today.


p.s. The comment link is on top. I know, I was looking for it down here too.


A. K. said...

A lie is a lie no matter what, but we all lie intentionally or unintentionally, sometimes we lie for good, sometimes we lie for our own benefits. I think lie is something that we cant escape, but we can avoid..

For instance, if my boss ask me about how he look in his stupid new shirt, am pretty sure i'll lie and tell something he wants to hear,... lOL...

Hey, have a great weekend... cause am going to have a blast.. lol...

Chocolatelover said...

The new layout looks good. :D
Thanks for informing that the comment section is on the top, i was looking down too. :P
The white lie theory sounds interesting. :P ANd even blue lie would sound god. :P

QM said...

@A.K. - Yes, I totally agree with you. I know lies are bad but sometimes, like your e.g., we just have to smile and wave. HAHAHAH

But oh well, who says life is simple?

Thanks, have fun at the gig!

QM said...

@Chocolatelover - Thank you! HAHAHAHA, I was looking down for myself as well!
Hmmm, maybe we could create another colour of lie? ;DD

Thousif Raza said...

i think you are rgt when you say that, and we are all guilty of saying it... but in my thinking... i think... its actually a good thing... not for all things but still a good thing.... if you understood anything, then you might know what i am saying abt ;)

and happy belated b'day... i'm so sorry i wasn't there..hope you had lots of fun... and temme what gift you got.?.

and its so swt of you to mention of me... :), we are great frenz aren't we....;) and D profile pic is awesome... love it :)

take care and keep writing..........

QM said...

@Thousif - HAHAHAH, yess, we all do it to please people but it's all for the better.

Hmm, no gifts since it was exam week :( But it didn't really matter cause my friends threw me a surprise party!

you're welcome(: && thank you!