Take me away, will you? Like far, far far away. Let's just go on the road, keep moving forward, not looking back. Please?
Yeah, having one of those days again when I thought I was happy but in the end, I'm not. It's so frustrating. I'm looking at someone and I feel like...I don't know, I can't describe it. Maybe it's because school is starting on Monday again and I have to go back to the same old routine again. Exams. Homework.Teachers. Assemblies. Yelling. Stress. And every time that happens, I would lie on my bed and just think of nothing cause I can't feel happy. I hate not being happy. I just hate it. I try to think of ways to do to make me happy and it doesn't work. Usually I don't have to think to be happy, it's just that today sucks.
And you know when they say: "This won't hurt a bit?" Yeah, the greatest lie of all time.
It's my 200th post! Wow, I've really come a long wayyyy. It doesn't feel like my 200th post, it just feel like another page of my life. YEAY:D HAPPY 200th POST, TALES OF A LUNATIC!!!
LOL, I just have to do that.
So what have I learned after 200 posts about life, friends, family, love, hate, sorrow, breakdown, clothes, fashion, boys, laughter, etc.? I have to admit my blog is the only place where I put my everything into it. It's more of like a monologue in my head that transcript into blogging. Okay, I'll breakdown what I've learned during my blogging age (lol, I honestly don't have any other idea!).
Family - They are my everything. Yes, we do have our rough days and arguments that result in yelling and tears. No matter how much I thought I hate them, I tend to forget that I do love them. It's love-hate relationship but the bond will never be broken :)
Friends - I've been lied to, hurt and oh god, the dramas :S But they make my world go around! I can tell them things that I can't tell my parents. I cry and laugh with them. We have our own dirty little secrets, shared those WILD, CRAZY adventures which I'm sure one day, we'll turn back and say "Those were the days" :')
Boys - Do I have to say more? HAHA. Did I have a boyfriend? Well, yes but it didn't work out. But we're still friends which I'm glad. Boys, they capture our hearts and we, girls fall so easily. But for now, boys are not my concern. I have plenty time after graduation :D But I have realized: I'M ATTRACTED TO PRETTY BOYS. Seriously, pretty faces boys. I find them really sexy like Bill Kaulitz and Adam Lambert. But there are so few pretty boys out there :(
My favourite Pretty Boy
BILL KAULITZ, you're a SEX GOD
Happiness - Without realizing it, whatever we are doing right now is all in that direction - to happiness. But what many fail to realize is that YOU CAN'T ACHIEVE happiness. It's not what's in the future that will bring you happiness or working really hard to get that post which you think will make you happy. It's this very moment, right now, reading my post, this is YOUR happiness. Just live in the moment and don't try too hard to predict the future, you'll never be happy :)
Sorrow - It's always the bad side that tends to hit us real hard and bring us down hard as well. But honestly, I believe we need both happiness and sorrow. Like the Yin and Yang, if you follow the Chinese, we need balance in life. If we're happy all the way, we tend to be blind to what's happening to others. If we're too sad, we'll lose the purpose of living.
School - GRADUATION half year awayyyy!!! Well, it's gonna be hard since I literally spend my childhood life and teenage life in school. It's like a second home to me. It's where I first met my best friend. The first time I got caned from teacher :S All sort of things happened in school that made up my life. I'm really glad that my school life is coming to an end but I know I'll really miss it.
Love - That's what keeps the world alive. Just because you don't have a boyfriend or girlfriend, doens't you're not loved or not loving. I love my family. I love my friends. I love my blog. I love my life. I love lasagna. I love Bill Klaulitz. Oh yeahh, LOTS of love going in there. There's a wider range of love than what we think it is. But the greatest love of all, is to love yourself :) Despite whatever flaw or things you hate about yourself, never doubt that you're just as loved as yourself.
Life - It's painful. It's hard. It's a ship wreck. It's a blackhole. Uh-huh, life is not easy. Period. Hahahaha, it is true. Life is harder than the quotes tend to visualize our minds. But we can make life better for all of us. Cause I don't think God just put us here to let us live but to let us see and make life better. Save the trees, stop the wars, save the hungry children, help the poor....If you can help and change someone's life, you're living life :)
That's one hell of a post!
I guess that's about it:) There's more I want to write but I figure that your eyes will get sore by then, HAHA. Anyways, thank you to all who read my blog, especially my blogging buddies ;) you guys just make blogging a fun place to be!
Okayy! Argentina vs. South Korea tonight at 7.30! Not gonna miss it!
Those are my friends. Those are their nail polish. That is my hair.
I hanged out at my friend's house after tuition. We painted our nails, gossip, bitched, and cam-whoring :D Hahaha, it was fun, we had a blast especially when I had to order pizza. I had to put up an accent while ordering. It's a tradition that we do.
I put up some nerdy Chinese accent since well, I am half Chinese and I could actually do it. LMAO. I nearly died doing it :P
Pizza Woman: What type of pizzas you want, ma'am?
Me: Chicken Pepperoni and Classified Chicken.
Pizza Woman: So all Chicken Pepperoni?
Me: (changing to Frenchie accent) Nonononono, Chicken Pepperoni and CLASSIFIED Chicken....CLAAA-SII-FF-II-EE-DDD Chicken.
(my friends dropped out and ran away, so when they laughed, I can't see them)
Pizza Woman: Okay, the total is -
Me: (Chinese accent) What?! I still more orders! More orders!
sighh, if only I recorded it but I don't think I can do it again without laughing! That's just a small part of it, there's more but it'll be tooooo long.
* * *
Now that we're passed that, I want to talk about something else that I found quite amusing. Can you define and conclude "love" LOGICALLY? You know, like how we all do experiments in schools before. First, there's a problem statement. Then, hypothesis....blah blah blah and lastly, conclusion.
Because some people actually do that. Not literally but indirectly, you know? It's like they crack their skulls open and try to solve "love" related issues especially relationships as though it's some equation or a puzzle.
I was so DUMBFOUNDED. Really. I mean, logically? Really? DUH. I love you, you love me; muah! Happy Ending.
But to defined "love" logically, I don't believe it. Love is the only word that can be defined in your own dictionary. I opened Oxford Dictionary and looked under 'love', nothing of the explanation seemed to be coherent. It's not a maths equation where you have the 'x' and 'y' flying around and you have to simplify it. You don't need to simplify love.
It's not a political issue where you have to rise the rights and wrongs about love. Like seriously? You just can't change it. It's there, in there in all of us. Yes, you broke your heart, it's painful and I believe those who try to conclude love logically is just putting a sheet of cover over the wound. Sigh, my dears, it's okay to cry and break down for one whole week and so what if you're a Simon Cowell or Hilary Clinton? Ego can kill you at times.
I went through that path once. I thought she was my best friend. It hurt so much. I tried to think of ALL logical things I could like WHY, HOW, WHEN, WHAT, WHO but then I realized, it's just like that. So I went down with an emotional trauma for a while but with the faith I still have and my good friends, I moved on but I never forget it.
And no, I didn't come up with any conclusions or definition of best friends or whatsoever. I don't want to spend the rest of my life ticking the 'you-have-to-meet-these-criteria' list, then I'll make you my best friend. I guess, we all have to fall and break and weep; then only we could fly higher, this time more aware of where the wind takes us.
But we, humans are always afraid on taking chances. Heck, just do it! If you fail, don't worry. Buckle up and strive again until you get it!
Love's not always black and white, my dear friend once said.
Ohh it isn't, she is so right. It's more than just the certificate marriage and vows that people take.
So, just take a chance and stay on the roller coaster :)
World Cup is BACK :D Football crazy is back! I'm rooting for Argentina and Japan for Asia. Who are you guys rooting for? As much as I like EPL but for England to draw against the USA is just so W-T-F moment especially that ball which slipped out from the England's goalkeeper's hand and let USA seal the deal.
But honestly, the World Cup atmosphere in South Africa is nothing compared to the EPL crowds who sings, drums and shout. All I hear from the South Africa's crowds were buzzing of loud horns. ALL THE WAY TIL THE MATCH END. Pay close attention and you'll hear behind the speaker's voice, there goes "BUZZZZZ.....BUZZZZZ.....BUZZZZ..." Like literally, no pausing and so on.
Maybe I'm so used to the shouts and cheers when I watch EPL matches that I get flat tuned out with the same flat tone buzzing sound that is playing at the World Cup.
Wait. Are you guys watching the World Cup? Cause I know some people who DON'T watch the World Cup and honestly, I don't even understand whyyyyy! My aunt said: "Seeing a bunch of men running in shorts, chasing after one ball to be put in the net."
Any football fan, don't even bother to argue on that. Don't even have the thought of winning a debate over that cause as much as we love football, that is as how much they hate football. Usually I just say, "I like watching football" and shut my ears out. We cheer louder when a goal is scored and they scowled louder when we do that.
Basically, it's nearly 1 am here, I don't know what to write anymore. I'm sick, just took 4 medications which 2 of them make me drowsy and it's hitting on me now. Might be my latest 'that-is-all-you-have-to-write' post but it's the best I can do.
One more week of holidays. I'm pretty sure I'll come up with something :)
I had this problem before but I never blogged about it cause I thought it only happened to me. Like, how would anyone understand since I thought it only happened to me. Until I was tweeting that I found out someone had a problem too!
The problem is WHY ARE THERE ANTS IN MY LAPTOP.
It happened a few months ago to me. As I type on the keyboard, little ants will running across the keyboard, the screen and I have to squash these little creatures with my fingertips. Seriously, get lost, dudes. My laptop, my little home. Yours is OUT at the garden!
I tried Google, oh boy, no wonder they said that Google knows everything. So the 1st thing I typed in was : 'Why is there'
and then drops down a menu bar with the first TOP searched line -
'Why is there a dead Pakistani on my couch?'
*silence* Why would you want to ask Google that? Why ask Google "why is there a dead Pakistani on my couch?" You shot him, I suppose? Like seriously, I had to pause for a moment before I could re-focus back to what I'm really searching for.
So the results came out and I concluded that ants actually like the warm environment around the laptop. The longer you on, the warmer it gets, the more likely ants would make your laptop as its nesting territory :OO
How to solve it? Google said VACUUM IT. You expect me to to use some gigantic plastic to suck out ants from my thousands $$$ baby? Google your head.
Put a cup of honey beside your laptop to lure the ants away. But what if they take the honey and bring it back to my laptop? Then I'll end up with ants bathe in honey.
Put your laptop under the sun. Errr, wont that just increase the temperature and therefore, more ants living in it?
Yeah. You know it. Don't listen to Google when it comes to solving problem. To solve the ants problem? Get those cooler based fans and place it beneath your laptop. No need for vacuum, honey, sweets, baits, surgery, plasters...just don't listen to Google, okay?
I typed in 'Is' at Google and the moment I space bared, these came out:
Actually, I quite like the taste of tears. Well, not as much as I used to when I was a kid. Back then, I presumed that tears were like water...you know, tap water; just that it had this salty taste. I know, how awesome. Our bodies actually have a pair of tanks filled with tap water.
Tears usually flow from sadness. There is tears for happiness but have to admit, sadness, sorrow, disappointment always have the stronger impact on us. I cry, you cry, he cries, she cries, they cry, we cry - who doesn't cry?
It comes to a point where we keep hearing this infamous quote: 'Stop crying already! Don't a bit, a bit, you wanna cry.' Well, that's the line that is used often here and yes, maybe at times we'll be thinking: 'Why the heck are you crying over that for?' We can't just judge people from things that are linked to them...but sigh, humans are very judgmental beings.
Hasn't it cross your mind that I cry because it makes me feel better? I cry because for once and for all, I can let it out and finally go back to sleep? I never liked people who keeps saying, STOP CRYING, IT'S NOT GONNA CHANGE ANYTHING or STOP CRYING, __________. Okay, duhh, I know, I'm not naive. I know what's done is done but crying is the only thing I can do at that moment.
'When you're happy, people will cheer with you; when you're sad, people will back against you'. Have you ever heard someone saying, STOP BEING HAPPY, DON'T A BIT, A BIT, YOU WANNA BE HAPPY. If anyone says that, it might just be another epic failed movie line. But I guess people prefer the feeling of joy and happiness more and when someone cries or is feeling down, most would tend to back down or simply ignore it.
I don't usually like these people but most of them do without even realizing it and well, I'm not the type who goes up to someone and say, 'You're being a bitch' but just got to accept some people just can't reach the expectations we put for. I know when someone is feeling down or sad and especially fakes to be happy while others don't so in the end, I'm the ears to everyone but I'm my own ears to myself.
Because sometimes some feelings just have to be act out. If someone you know wants to cry, let them CRY as loud and long as they want - then, they'll fall asleep (crying makes you sleepy) and once they wake up, they would definitely feel much better. Never tell someone to stop crying, it's like another way to say 'I don't care about how you feel. Just stop crying, it's annoying'.
Usually when someone cries, I just stand by their side and wait. Once they have enough, I give them a tissue, hug them and say 'smile'. LOL, don't ever talk and babble on asking what's wrong, this, that cause honestly, crying is already an emotional breakdown.
So let's not tell someone to Stop Crying, shall we? Instead, let's say Cry With All Your Heart Out :)
OMG. I mean, this had been in the news lately but I never watched the video until today and....I can't believe this is happening. 18 months old and smoking 40 cigarettes per day :O Even those rebel kids at my school aren't overdose.
Sad, maybe scary but it's true. It's shocking really to see and hear the dad say, 'My son is healthy'. Yeah, well, on the outside! Imagine the image of his lungs :( I heard the authorities are getting down to action and if the parents are guilty, they would be charge under Child Abuse.
Poor child :( If he doesn't get his nicotine(cigarette), they said, he would bang his head against the wall, demanding for it. I WILL NEVER, EVER SMOKE. I took a few sips once (parent's cigarette), heyyy, I was curious - like why is it almost everyone smokes? And ewwww, it sucks! I hate that feeling of smoke at my throat and the taste of it.
It's freaking tastelessly horrible.
But I'm still so curious, why do people still smoke? I mean, every single human on this earth know about the effects on smoking but cigarettes companies are still making millions from the demands on most people. So I did some research and found out that most smokers are 18 to 35 years old and new smokers are about the age of 13.
So Why Do They Smoke If They Know It's Bad?
~ Nicotine: Like the child in the above video, he has got addicted to it. Nicotine. Like how an alcoholic can't stray away from his alcohol. It is nicotine that chain up these people to keep coming back for more.
~ Peer Pressure: This is the top reason for teens to smoke. They see their friends doing it and they want to do it because they want to feel accepted. As old as this may sound, it is true. I've seen some people doing it, it's worse than you think.
~ Cause It's Cool Like That: Seriously? Smoking is cool? Smoking which leads you to your death is cool? Getting lung, mouth cancer is cool? How cool will you be once you get the news you got a few months or days to live?
~ Depression: The world is getting more competitive by day. Money rates drop down, economy goes haywire, wars are everywhere...They just think smoking relaxes them but in reality, smoking cuts down your oxygen supply, thus making you feel light headed and so called at ease.
~ I Need To Lose Weight: Ladies, smoking do not make you thinner. There's no such thing, 'If I quit smoking, I gain my 30 pounds back.' There are overweight people who smoke and trust me, they look worse than before.
For whatever the reasons are, quit smoking. It's easy to start smoking but it's hard to quit - I know. But there's also reasons why you must stop smoking too. For a better health, better life, better environment for your family, better world?
I, for one, hate the smell of cigarettes. It's a turn off. Usually if I can't avoid it, I hold my breath and quickly run into somewhere and BREATHEEEEE again. Dramatic much? I just hate the smell, it gives out that really unpleasant odor.
Speaking of unpleasant, the term break has started! :D YEAYY - 2 freaking weeks of pleasure! Sigh, I have to spend more time on debate practice, there's a zone competition after the holidays. Aiming to win! Yeahh, extremely tough but we think we can if we really do our best.
I think he's the most gorgeous guy that ever walked on earth.
Okay. How many of you love movies? We all do, right? And how often do we recite those actor's quotes? Even though that movie was born before we were, we still somehow know the punch lines of some famous movies.
I remember my first movie line that I picked up back when I was younger:
Hasta la vista, baby! - Terminator 2, Judgement Day 1991
and I wasn't born yet! But then, who doesn't know this line?
~ Some of the unforgettable, famous movie lines that I think will keep moving forward:
May the Force be with you - Star Wars, 1977
E.T. phone home - E.T. The Extraterrestrial, 1982
Louis, I think this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship - Casablanca, 1942
Bond. James Bond. - Dr. No, 1962
There's no place like home - Wizards of Oz, 1939
Houston, we have a problem - Apollo 13, 1995
Mama always said life was like a box of chocolate. You never know what you're gonna get. - Forrest Gump, 1994 ( I love this )
And there'll always be at times we answer back with our favourite star's quotes; the best part is when they actually think you came up with that line!
Can't wait to watch Shrek 3 during the next week holidays! YEAY, 2 weeks! And maybe, I'll get my Shrek line :D Who doesn't love the green ogre? He is sooo disgusting. LOL! Okay, 2 more days of exams. Back to my student's routine :/