Saturday, September 11, 2010

Twist in Life

open house :)

Aunt & Sis.

grandparents <3


There's been quite a lot of things going on lately. No, nothing serious or drastic., you know. Eid Mubarak was fun, though not as fun as I celebrated in the city this year. Usually we'll go back to my grandpa's hometown but this year, we didn't. Sigh :(

Speaking of life, I didn't realize that I was holding on and hoping that things would remain the same forever. Sub-consciously, I think all of us are scared of changes at the beginning. We begin to question 'Why', 'How' and 'What' but the truth is, there's really no honest answers. Just answers we create to comfort ourselves.

Sometimes I sit back and keep on asking myself - "Where did it all go wrong?" I spent loads of time, mentally thinking about it that at one point, I felt depressed. Haha, I think too much, that's the problem. But soon I realized "Nothing went wrong. Things just...changed."

Okay, here's an analogy. Imagine 2 people are walking on one straight road and they reached a junction; a left turn and a right turn. This guy feels like he has to take the right turn and the other thinks that he has to take the left turn. And so, they cross each other and took their own turns. At the end, there's no good reason why they took those turns, same applies to changes. It just happened.

'People change. Hearts move on.' At one point, you felt that it was heading this way; then all of a sudden, you get lost in the woods, trying to find your way out. At once, we start to panic - human nature :) But the truth is, we shouldn't panic cause we're lost. The thing is: we are never really lost. We just think we are.

That's what happened to me. I thought I was lost. I keep looking for a way out, back to where I last came from. But you know as they say 'keep moving forward'. It was hard at first, it was hard to accept and grasp it but I've come to my sense. My mind still wanders and think about it but as for my feelings and heart, they've moved on, slowly but greatly.

We are all scared of the changing and growing process. We're not sure where we're heading, what's to come and why is this happening to me situations...The key to this whole thing is just to accept it as the way it is. Don't fight or deny it but just say 'I'll work this out'. I may be not some 60 years old philosopher but I know at this point, that's a fact we all have to accept to get our lives going.

You know what I CANNOT wait for now? SPM to be over done with. Like shit over.

I have to really start studying now. I don't want to regret later. Cause then, I'll have no one to blame but myself.

Life's a beach, I'm just playing in the sand ;)


Huda Merchant said...

everyone can write but only some people can write really well like you :) I love this post, as usual. I can relate to it. Best of Luck for SPM again :)

Thousif Raza said...

loved it... changes are scary but if we accept them as a part of ouyr lives... it can be a lil less... and loved the explanation you gave :)

take care and keep writing............

QM said...

Thank you guys! *hearts* :)